4.26.2016

what is it in us?

a displaced "fourty" year old has displaced herself in my book.
Diaries 1910-1913 Franz Kafka.
she says it was lovely meeting you, and to yours truly; if you wanna.

to boo!hoo! or to bookmark? you'll be happy to know i placed her on page 40:

January 3. "You," I said, and then gave him a little shove with my knee, "I want to say goodbye." At this sudden utterance some saliva flew from my mouth as an evil omen.

She can live there and feel silly or stay in Oakland on March 04, as the postmarked date suggests.

and it's ironic, and it's sad, two nights prior i dreamt i drew a pig on the abdomen of a child. i threw up in a bathtub:  a hairball.  my doors felt gun shots and i anticipated being attacked. later, i panicked and it still rules me from the pit of my stomach, you said, i was dreaming of being vulnerable to you. and then you punched me in the gut with oblivion. i ache, i can't eat, i hate everyone and i hate love.